I've been trying to convince the owner of my favorite watering hole to change the name from "The Pink Snapper" to "Lipstick on a Pig." It would lend it cachet, make it seem as venerable as an old English pub. We could wear tweed jackets with patches on the sleeves and sound much smarter than we are. But the owner's afraid it would be viewed as unfriendly to the authorities, not to mention Mabel.

And speaking of Mabel, I had this conversation with Felicia yesterday—

Felicia: You remember that old buddy of mine I thought was dead?

Me: Uh-huh.

Felicia: Well, he turned up living.

There have been similar rumors about me. I'm not quite sure if they're true or not, but never count me out unless you've spat on the coffin.

Now where was I ... ?

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Snatches from the Pink Snapper — 7 (6/24/08)

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